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Showing posts from June, 2019

Resist the unkind reaction

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I am a lemons into lemonade girl (or just stick them in a large Gin!). A cup half full, life is for living lady. Most of the time my instinctive response is kindness. I have practiced enough that it is almost unconscious. That is not to say I don’t have mean moments. I can be awfully unkind. This usually occurs when I feel life, or some person, has been unkind to me. I react with less patience, less empathy and compassion and less thought. When we are tired and stressed, when a feeling of unfairness pervades our mindset it is difficult to find the optimism and breathing space for kindness. Not least towards ourselves. This is entirely, justifiably human. No one can be Mary Poppins all the time! Not without people frequently inserting that umbrella where the sun doesn’t shine! We are bound to have moments where we are unkind. I strive only for this; - try to resist the unkind. Do not be drawn by the unkindness of others. Wherever possible be the balm and understanding that is ne

Kindness through Choice

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I used to wonder if kindness was simply inherent. People were either kind or they weren’t. Then I found myself actively “developing” kindness in myself. Empathy training if you will. I would take a few seconds to consider the impact somethingmight have if I were the recipient. How would I feel? What would the outcome be? I soon realisedthat there is very little gain on either end of an unkind transaction. It might feel like you momentarily gain control or an advantage but, ultimately, you would lose more: the moral high ground, self worth, respect and reputation. It seems slightly mercenary to talk about kindness in economic terms but I realised that, much like most other aspects of human interaction, kindness is a way of validating ourselves and others. It contributes to our purpose and existence. We want to accumulate it. We desire more of it in our lives and we love to distribute it and see the results. Like a currency. And like a currency we can choose how we manage our reserves. W